Friday, February 13, 2009

The Four Types of Pictures Girls Will Put on Their Myspace/Facebook

Believe it or not, the millions of different pictures found on any girls myspace/facebook account can be categorized into 4 Basic Types. With the help of my severely overweight golden retriever I have taken the liberty to catalog these four types of pictures for your convenience. It is without further adieu that I present the....



4 Basic Types of All Girl Pictures on Myspace/Facebook


Picture One: The "Emo" Picture

Ahh yes. What a fine specimen. What many people don't know, is that the "Emo" Picture is not just limited to those that that shop at Hot Topic. No, actually almost every girl has a "serious" photo, something they took to show their more "deep" side. While there are varying levels of "emo-ness" in varying girls "Emo" pictures, often times the serious pose will be combined with different photo editing techniques. Additionally, there may be self written poetry to reflect just how conflicted their life struggles are.















Picture Two: The "Face" Picture

You're sitting there at your computer one day, minding your own business, parousing some friend of a friend's myspace, when all of a sudden you come across a girl with a pretty nice face. Interested, you probe deeper, clicking on the girl's photo albums, and trying to find out a little bit more about her. To your dissapointment though, while she has a lot of pictures, they all seem to be from the neck up. You're still interested, so you click on some of her friend's pictures, thinking "Maybe they have some pictures with her?". You finally find a picture they all took at a recent sporting event, and as your eyes roll across the tags in the picture, you finally find her. "Holy.... Wait... No that can't... but that's her hair? EWWWW" Well, I hate to say it my friend, but you have fallen victim to the "Face" Picture.

Like it or not, "The Face", is a fairly common occurence on any social networking site. Thankfully, (atleast for the guys anyway), there are several warning signs of TF. In fact, there's a very handy method to figure out if a girl is trying to hide something on her albums.

If the ratio of her "Face" pictures is greater than 3:1 of her "Full Body" pictures, I would be warry. However if the ratio is any greater than 6:1, you may have a full fledged "Facer" on your hands.



Picture Three: The "Mirror" Picture
Not exactly a type of picture, but more of a technique, the "Mirror" picture, is one of the most common pictures on any girl's myspace/facebook. Don't believe me? Check for yourself. I'll wait until you come back...




























...Anway, the mirror pic is not too complex, however there are many variations on it. Some mirror pics combine the "Emo" and "Face" types. Some types incorporate other girls. Some even are taken with funny hats. (This last type is rare, girls are not usually fans of humorous headwear) Whatever the case, "Mirror Pics" are the staple of any girls photos and play a very important role.




Picture Four: The "I look like crap but they look good" Picture


A personal favorite, the "ILLCBTLG", encompasses all pictures in which a girl criticizes her appearance and/or says how much better her friends look than her. You obviously would not put this picture up if you felt that it made you look as bad as fecal matter. Also, while this may be an attempt at an off-handed compliment to your friends, why not compliment them, while leaving the self insulting compliments out. A better caption may be "Me and My Friends. They look good!" or in girl-internet language,

""

1 comment:

  1. I should direct you to:
    http://www.encyclopediadramatica.com/Fat_girl_angle_shot
    note: not safe for work.
    -benrr101

    ReplyDelete